


Kiss me and Smile for me

by rufferto



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Drabble, Episode: s05e12-13 The Diamond of the Day, Fluff, M/M, Romance, slightly AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-23
Updated: 2015-09-23
Packaged: 2018-04-22 23:34:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4854878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rufferto/pseuds/rufferto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Merlin isn't a coward and Arthur knows it. He can't fathom why Merlin won't come so he turns back to try one more time....<br/>And his fears are well founded for there is just something in Merlin's look.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss me and Smile for me

“I’m not coming.” Merlin had told him

Those words were Arthur’s undoing. He’d lashed out. How could he be without Merlin? Arthur turned around and stopped him from leaving. He crowded him against the door and gripped his shoulders. 

Merlin stiffened. It had been a long time. Five years. Five long years since Arthur had held him like this. It didn’t matter, he still couldn’t go. It wouldn’t change anything.

“But _I need you_!!” Arthur exclaimed and wanted to shake him. For so many years he was just simply there. All the time. How could he go without Merlin? He slid his hands down Merlin’s arms to lace their fingers together.

Merlin wanted to grant Arthur's request but he could not so he was a little selfish for the first time in his life. He asked for something for him alone.

“Kiss me.” Merlin said softly.

Arthur’s mouth went dry at the idea. He had sworn off Merlin since his marriage. So he took Merlin's lips for the last time. It was a hungry, desperate kiss that left him aching inside for all those years they were together, before his marriage. He’d never been as close to anyone as he was with Merlin. Had Merlin been a girl. Arthur would have had a hard choice between him and Gwen.

“Smile for me.” Merlin whispered.

Arthur smiled his heart out and committed Merlin’s face to memory. It would probably be the last time he ever smiled. 

Merlin could move mountains and dry lakes for that smile. It was his life. His other half, his soul. Merlin traced the contours of Arthur’s face and tried to keep his expression light.

There was something deep and dark behind his old friend’s eyes. Arthur knew. Arthur somehow knew he was going to do something difficult, perhaps dangerous. Arthur knew, deep in his heart and he was filled with worry. Merlin was no coward.

“That’s all I needed, Arthur.” Merlin touched his cheek gently and Arthur leaned into his hand.

“Merlin, I lo— “

Merlin stopped him by putting his fingers to his lips. “Don’t.”

And Merlin touched their heads together. “I’ll come to you when I am finished with this task. You won’t even miss me.”

When he left Arthur already missed him. It was like a piece of his heart had been torn out. During the entire journey he kept looking over his shoulder expecting to see Merlin there.

*FIN*

 

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the John denver song "Leaving on a Jet Plane"  
> "So kiss me and smile for me  
> Tell me that you'll wait for me  
> Hold me like you'll never let me go"
> 
> I heard this today on my playlist and had to write something for Merthur.


End file.
